luthario
New member
- Feb 20, 2025
- 73
- 8
i don't think i'll tell you to go on walks, pick up a hobby, or practice self-care because i'm sure you've heard those things a hundred times already
but something i've come to realize is that sometimes, when life falls apart all at once, we start treating ourselves like we're the problem that needs to be fixed
you lost your job, your friendships feel different, your family doesn't seem to understand you, and someone you trusted betrayed you. that's a lot for one person to carry at once. i can't imagine how exhausting it must feel to wake up every day with all of that on your mind
but i hope you realize that these things happening to you aren't a reflection of your worth as a person. losing your job doesn't make you a failure. people turning against you doesn't mean you're unlikable. someone betraying you doesn't mean you're not deserving of love. sometimes, terrible things happen to us without there being some hidden lesson we need to learn or some personal flaw we need to correct
and here's something i wish more people understood about depression: you don't always have to find something that makes you happy. sometimes, you just need something that makes being here a little less difficult for the next hour. you don't have to love your life right now to give yourself the chance to experience a different version of it someday
if you have no money, no energy, and nobody you feel comfortable talking to, start smaller than you think you need to. sit somewhere with a little sunlight. listen to an album from beginning to end. watch something you've already seen a hundred times because it feels familiar. write down all the things you're angry about without trying to make them sound reasonable. let yourself enjoy something without feeling guilty that your life isn't in order yet
and please don't make the mistake of thinking you have to become a completely different person before you're allowed to have a better life
you can be struggling and still deserve kindness. you can be a mess and still deserve companionship. you can have days when you accomplish absolutely nothing and still be worthy of being here
also, please don't mistake the people who have hurt you for the whole world. i know it probably feels that way right now, especially when the people you expected to care for you are the ones making you feel the most alone. but your current circumstances are not a reliable preview of every relationship, every opportunity, or every good thing you'll encounter in the future
i've struggled with depression myself, and even now, i think a small part of it still stays with me. so i'm not saying any of this as someone who has everything figured out. i'm saying it as someone who understands that getting better isn't always some beautiful, inspiring transformation. sometimes it's just learning to stop being cruel to yourself on the days when you can barely function
but there's something in your post that i really want you to take seriously. you mentioned having thoughts of suicide and already making preparations. please don't try to handle that part alone. tell someone you can trust what's happening, even if it's just one person, and ask them to stay with you. put some distance between yourself and anything you might use to hurt yourself, and please reach out to a mental health professional or emergency service as soon as possible
i don't know your whole story, and i won't pretend that a comment from a stranger can fix what you're going through. but i hope you give yourself the chance to find out what your life can look like beyond this chapter. you don't have to believe that everything will be okay right now. just please don't decide that it never can be
you don't have to figure out how to fix your entire life today. for now, just give yourself the chance to see what tomorrow might look like. you deserve that chance, even if you can't believe it yet
but something i've come to realize is that sometimes, when life falls apart all at once, we start treating ourselves like we're the problem that needs to be fixed
you lost your job, your friendships feel different, your family doesn't seem to understand you, and someone you trusted betrayed you. that's a lot for one person to carry at once. i can't imagine how exhausting it must feel to wake up every day with all of that on your mind
but i hope you realize that these things happening to you aren't a reflection of your worth as a person. losing your job doesn't make you a failure. people turning against you doesn't mean you're unlikable. someone betraying you doesn't mean you're not deserving of love. sometimes, terrible things happen to us without there being some hidden lesson we need to learn or some personal flaw we need to correct
and here's something i wish more people understood about depression: you don't always have to find something that makes you happy. sometimes, you just need something that makes being here a little less difficult for the next hour. you don't have to love your life right now to give yourself the chance to experience a different version of it someday
if you have no money, no energy, and nobody you feel comfortable talking to, start smaller than you think you need to. sit somewhere with a little sunlight. listen to an album from beginning to end. watch something you've already seen a hundred times because it feels familiar. write down all the things you're angry about without trying to make them sound reasonable. let yourself enjoy something without feeling guilty that your life isn't in order yet
and please don't make the mistake of thinking you have to become a completely different person before you're allowed to have a better life
you can be struggling and still deserve kindness. you can be a mess and still deserve companionship. you can have days when you accomplish absolutely nothing and still be worthy of being here
also, please don't mistake the people who have hurt you for the whole world. i know it probably feels that way right now, especially when the people you expected to care for you are the ones making you feel the most alone. but your current circumstances are not a reliable preview of every relationship, every opportunity, or every good thing you'll encounter in the future
i've struggled with depression myself, and even now, i think a small part of it still stays with me. so i'm not saying any of this as someone who has everything figured out. i'm saying it as someone who understands that getting better isn't always some beautiful, inspiring transformation. sometimes it's just learning to stop being cruel to yourself on the days when you can barely function
but there's something in your post that i really want you to take seriously. you mentioned having thoughts of suicide and already making preparations. please don't try to handle that part alone. tell someone you can trust what's happening, even if it's just one person, and ask them to stay with you. put some distance between yourself and anything you might use to hurt yourself, and please reach out to a mental health professional or emergency service as soon as possible
i don't know your whole story, and i won't pretend that a comment from a stranger can fix what you're going through. but i hope you give yourself the chance to find out what your life can look like beyond this chapter. you don't have to believe that everything will be okay right now. just please don't decide that it never can be
you don't have to figure out how to fix your entire life today. for now, just give yourself the chance to see what tomorrow might look like. you deserve that chance, even if you can't believe it yet