I play both but they give me a different vibe. Obviously this is a generalization and there's always good/bad games that don't apply to this list. And things like art style are just preference.
(just my opinion)
Otome pros:
- Prettier/more delicate art styles, more shoujo influences
- Sometimes cuter/softer LIs
- More games to choose from
- Sometimes higher production value? They're more likely to have gameplay elements
Otome cons:
- Self-insert MCs
- Often kind of boring/formulaic plot
- Often stereotypical male/female dynamic (where the MC practices cooking for their LI etc. - I just think it's boring)
BL pros:
- More fleshed out MCs
- Voiced MCs
- Darker, heavier themes on average, not scared to be edgy
- Boys kissing <3
BL cons:
- Too many H-scenes
- Noncon/rape as a plot device
- The most digusting messed up bad endings for shock value or something?
- LIs are uglier on average (for me personally, I like shoujo-style male characters and BL LIs are more often the seme, masculine type)
So I play both but they both kind of annoy me sometimes. But sometimes you get the perfect game that hits all the pros from both lists..