There's this one day where I happen to ate an ungodly amount of beans, and soda enough to drown a morbidly-obese competitive eater. Then I made my buddy to help check out whether there's a hole in my pants or not, before I rip out one of the most offensive flatulence known to men. Offensive enough to be classified as a chemical weapons of mass destruction. He got hospitalized and when he got out, he swore that one day, he'll charge me with crime against humanity.
The only part that I made up, is the part where he got hospitalized. Although, it'd be a very different story if he lit it on fire. Flatulence is actually flammable, and those that are dumb enough to ignite them, will find themselves in the ER with burns on their balls, asshole, and buttocks. Plus the embarrassment when you've got to explain to the doctor, how the hell you even get those burns.
